It was beautiful. It was so full of enthusiasm. The room was bubbling with the kind of energy I hadnt seen in ages. The get-together at IIT was amazing. The sight of cheerful people around you is so refreshing. I think i have drawn from that energy. Recharged and reassured, I feel alot better in the same place i once thought dull and boring.

Three weeks of India passed in an absolute jiffy. It was fun. Great memories.


Nothing has changed here and it never will. The supremely superficial GORA lifestyle, their well rehearsed robotic greetings, shitty food, crappy parties in the name of get-togethers. It will all keep irritating me throughout my stay here.

The blimeys, the bollocks, evening tea, cricket, shakespeare. Those typical English peculiarities. The stereotypes "mind your language", "yes minister", "my fair lady" and the likes had created. Its all a farse. They are not that funny. What a disappointment.

It is not that time of the year when homesickness begins to set in. Why do I then feel wrong? Darn, this is not how I want it to be. I have to stick around for at least one year. In a place so dull that even the sun doesnt shine(!). Add to that courses on quantum, stat mech and multivariable calculus and a twenty minute walk to class(I havent missed any!).
Its a hard life alright!

Things have calmed down. Classes in full gear. Its monotonous. But its scary. Theres always work. I have put it in for a month hoping it will bear fruit some day. Question is that there are ten more such months ahead. Is it sustainable? I think its just within the realms of possible. We'll find out.

Even more concerning is this ever so sharply rising feeling. I dont know what to call it. Blame it on my vocab. And its only increasing. Its not "lonely" because I have friends and I chat for a while. Its not "dejected" as I am where I wanted to be and doing what I wanted to. I dont know what it is. And it rises all the time. Its hard to put in words (At least with my vocab!!). And its very negative. I think it stems from being in an alien nation. For I never felt this way before. Or could be the fact that I am taking myself alot more seriously now. Nah!! its the former. For sure.

Hell I am at Oxford! Its beautiful. I have a great room. And my own loo/bathroom (a stark contrast from mukh west days). I have great teachers. A lovely set of friends. I even enjoy quantum classes. I have free fruits. I dont eat a good lunch. But I have at least come to terms with the fact that bad food is a universal phenomenon and very rarely do you get anything worth hogging! My cooking is improving. I can boil rice now and make an omlette as good as Thapa/Bajrangi. I can even solve some assignment problems without opening a book! Thus, to quote an illustrious sportsy from college, "its all good yaar".

But then, I dont feel right. Somethings missing. My social life isn't as happening as it once used to be. I dont particularly relish bars and bops, but i am getting along. That front is fine. I am happy with my studies. I could do more but it doesnt bother me alot. I play football/frisbee almost every saturday. I am occupied most of the time.

But this "thing", I dont know what to do with it. And its wearing me down..........

talat

I think I owe this write up to him. For without these songs I would have never come to appreciate the beauty of old Indian music. The man doesnt get due recognition for his amazing contribution to Indian cinema (As is the case with most people I like. V.V.S.Laxman being a case in point!!!) . Most of our generation, has in all likelihood, not even heard the name.
Even though I heard alot of his music as a child. It is only now that I am coming to terms with the lyrics. I enjoy them much more now. Some songs can be heard via this blog too.

He was a sensation in his time. The period of the 50s is still called the golden period for Indian music. For people like C.Ramchand, Salil Chowdhury, Roshan and Anil Biswas, Talat sang some of the most memorable songs. I dont want this to be biographical but certain things just need to be highlighted to emphasize his contribution.

Introduced as the Frank Sinatra of India on the extremely popular Joe Franklin show, he was Indias first singer do a concert tour. Performed to packed houses in Madison square garden.
Was a huge star when he started off. As grapewine has it, Talat went on a haj for two months. Mohammed Rafi happened in those two months. Rafis popularity soared and Talat soon had competition. He was however, still a favorite with music directors for the blues sort of music. His smooth velvety voice was irreplacable.

With loud music catching up, Talat sort of songs were soon not popular anymore. Alot of factors actually contributed to his decline. Salil Chowdhury and C.Ramchand were on their way out. Also a smoking habit, slowly reduced the amazing charm the voice once contained.
His ghazals though are still among the most popular non-film albums.

The songs found on this blog are the most popular film songs of his. Do take some time out and listen to them."Sham-e-gum" is my favourite with "pyar par bas to nahin hai" coming a close second!

This is only a small effort to introduce you to some good old Indian blues. People who enjoy Rafi and Kishores sad(!) numbers will definitely like these ones too.
(see the songs at the bottom the playlist on the right)
(few songs in the playlist at the bottom)

First impressions

From one pretty college to another!

The celebrations were on. Thousands on the streets going wild. Speakers blasting full volume. I was leaving after all!! A mere coincidence that I left on Ganesh Chaturthi.

It seemed as though my departure was being celebrated throughout the country.

The heart sank to depths it had never known before. The fact that India won the 2020 cup was the only solace. I was, hence (!), leaving on a great note. Hoping that it was a sign of things to come, I moved on.

UK is pretty. My campus, arguably the prettiest. People are great. Wear a smile for everyone all the time. That’s what stands out for me in the British culture. It teaches people to be nice to others. No don’t. don’t doubt my indianness. I am as Indian as any young Indian should be. Being kind to strangers doesn’t come so easy to me. My uncivilized, brash and ill mannered behaviour is a harsh contrast to what I see around. That isn’t changing any firang opinions about Indians anyway.

Time to change!! Change the way I walk, talk and dress (ever heard of a sub-fusc???)

But, these guys don’t talk. They smile and that’s it. Move on. The gesture has got to be followed up, I thought. But no, speaking is a sin. The mantra seems to be “You mind your own business and I mind mine”. But then I am as Indian as any young Indian is. Come on . Where’s all the gossip. The banter. The purposeless, fruitless, meaningless but for some reason, refreshing chatter. I long for a good long meaningless chat with anyone.

Oh yes! That happens in the pubs. When ones at liberty to say any thing on the face of this earth and pass it off as drunken revelry.

Man. These guys drink. No. They guzzle. Gallons and gallons of alcohol. No wonder they are all so huge. And they walk fast. Its embarrassing to be overtaken by old ladies on your way to the department. Doesn’t do much to lift an already depleting morale.

Then, to add insult to injury, there’s the food. Never thought being vegetarian(well…lacto-ova actually) could be such a punishment. Living off boiled carrots, boiled beans, boiled potatoes (with peel) boiled x, boiled y and boiled z doled out in humungous quantities could be quite a challenge. And to pay hefty sums for eating this shit. Wheres the good old daal, roti, sabji.

Thank god for eggs. Those pink (not white/yellow!!) little oval saviors that sacrifice themselves to feed ailing souls like me.

Shall save some criticism for the next post. Am still learning to live in this avatar. More later…………………

The GRE cataclysm (cant say tragedy!!!)

Am GREing after all!
Only thing that comes to mind when you hear 9/11 is disaster. Absolutely. Nothing else. There it is. Couldnt have been more apt. 9/11, 2007. My GRE date. What a start!
And to think that I attend classes regularly now. Its happened for a week now. get up at 8. go to the 10 class. come back. watch tv. watch tv. watch tv. study for an hour. At least it is a routine.
A thousand things to fit in. Chemistry books. Well Theoretical Chemistry to be precise.Loads and loads of them. waiting to be opened . only gathering dust. MIT OCW. Paradigm Shift. A book i resolved to finish. Nothing progressing except the GRE. That too at the slowest possible rate. I am in a mess.
Blame it all on the BCCI. They schedule cricket matches to suit us perfectly. There s always one on during boards, during annuals, during term tests and now, in my case, the GRE!
9/11 is also when the twenty-twenty world cup starts. FOOLS. 9/11. The dates got to be respected. A gala opening ceremony on 9/11. Unthinkable!. Fools! Also my GRE on 9/11.

"We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope" said Martin Luther King. Hope someone asks the ETS to cancel all exams on 9/11. Else, I must accept the disappointment!

shantraram (book)

The fact that this was to be made into a movie with Johny Depp playing the lead and Mira Nair directing was the sole inspiration to go through this one.

The Gregory David Roberts saga is very "filmy" with all its very predictable "twists" and aptly based in the city of bombay!

"A literary masterpiece.......... it has the grit and pace of a thriller" screams the cover.
Trust me, it isn't even close to being any of those.

He of course does his bit to promote two already well established notions. "India, the city of cows and slums" and "Indians, a heart of gold" which we know to be false.

So heres Lin(short for LING(dick for the uninitiated))
playing lover,fugitive, drug addict, actor, doctor(yes!), mujahid(huh!) one after the other and u wonder if it is the same book! A bizarre hotch-potch story results.

"True story of 8 years of the bombay underworld" says another screamer.

hah! yes i trust that!!!!

I went to the Leopolds in Bombay. Wasnt even close to the description in the book.
hardly any foreigners. a few guys drinking. no banter. no crowd. all this in the evening at 5, not even a white lady (he speaks of white prostitutes and in numbers!!).

The leopolds guy though was making his buck from the book. He was selling hard bound copies of Shantaram inside!!!!

A very very overrated book. All books that get popular these days get a rave. Thats probably because they are all found on shopping portals. Unfortunately, it does not work the other way.